47 - Just Like a Movie (ft. Dylan Carlino) - Tummy Time Podcast

Stand-up comedian and 2023 Funniest Person in Austin, Dylan Carlino jumps on the podcast and it plays out just like a movie. Welcome to Tummy Time! Strap in for Dylan’s sit-com with Phoebe Bridgers and Maggie Rogers, making enemies with the popular kids, and the highs and lows brought on by stand-up comedy. You ever make a shirt to celebrate your friendship? Get all your fighting moves from “Alias” and “Buffy the Vampire Slayer?” Are you a straight guy chaser? Funny, fun episode with the funniest person in all of Austin, TX.

00:00 - Message From the Hosts
01:05 - Intro - Best Friends on a T-Shirt
01:56 - Welcome to Tummy Time, Funniest Person in Austin, Dylan Carlino!
02:58 - Shepherd's Pie
03:46 - They Got Country Music in Massachusetts?
04:47 - I will be friends with Phoebe Bridgers and show her my tattoo.
06:21 - Phoebe Bridgers is Like Rap
06:57 - Maggie Rogers Bops
07:13 - Dylan Carlino's Sit-com with Phoebe Bridgers and Maggie Rogers
09:23 - Sober in Spite of AA
10:24 - Grindr is Making Things Too Easy
10:44 - The Human Toilet
11:44 - A Guy Offered Me $500 to Shit on His Chest
12:21 - I'm 6' 5" and Have Watched a Lot of 'Alias' and 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer'
13:54 - Started Doing Stand-up in Massachusetts and Moved to Portland
15:21 - Were You a Smart Kid?
16:11 - My Sister Died in 8th Grade, Sorry I Don't Care About Schoolwork
17:39 - My Parents Couldn't Ground Me For Very Long
18:12 - My Dad's New Wife is James Taylor's Housekeeper
18:45 - Some of This is Bad with Dylan Carlino and Colton Dowling is a Podcast and it is the Lion's Den
20:31 - Tummy Time, Number 89 Comedy Podcast in the Czech Republic for the Month of September 2023
22:59 - We Get Fans One at a Time
23:30 - Hi, Kayla!
24:29 - Evading Cops on Country Roads
25:00 - Long, Camel Peacoat
26:02 - "Hi, my name is Jodie and my son is gay."
27:19 - Guyliner
28:22 - Mall Trip with the Popular Girls
29:31 - Lunchtime at the Popular Kids' Table
30:05 - All the Popular Kids Hated Me Until My Sister Died, Then They Loved Me
31:20 - The REALLY Popular Girls Took Me In
33:23 - Notorious Non-Straight Guy Chaser, Dylan Carlino
35:16 - I Think Women Are Beautiful, It's Just...
36:24 - You Didn't Even Ask Me About My Day!
36:59 - Mother-Daughter Tag Team Bully Action
38:25 - What It's Like Performing, How Long You've Been in Austin
39:13 - Funniest Person in Austin
40:14 - I Started Stand-up in Massachusetts and It Went a Little Too Well...
42:31 - Comedy Has Been Great, All My Jokes Are About Me
43:48 - I Love Comedy But It's Also Destroyed My Life and Broken Me Down
44:47 - What's It Like After Winning Funniest Person in Austin?
45:57 - Movie Moment Love Confession [Drunk Edition]
48:06 - Telling Someone How You Feel is the WORST Thing Ever
49:38 - Straight Guy Chasin'
51:03 - Evidence on Straight Guy Love: My Only Relationship Was with a Straight Guy
51:46 - Comment Below If You're Straight and Dylan Has Chased You
52:11 - Student Body President Speech
52:55 - Don't Scuff Up Your White Shoes!
54:28 - Air Jordans: The Ultimate Straight Bait
55:32 - Running Twos
58:04 - Check out Dylan Carlino on Instagram: @dylanpcarlino
59:03 - Listen to Some of This is Bad Podcast: @someofthisisbad
59:24 - We'll See You Next Tummy Time